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Put Yourself First

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What does putting yourself first really mean?

Putting yourself first has nothing to do with being selfish. Instead, it is about living your life in a way which enables you to achieve and maintain balance and well-being.

Many of us are really bad at putting ourselves first

Every day in every way, I see examples of people not putting themselves first – and mum’s are especially like this, because of their nurturing and caring role for the family.

Why is it important to put yourself first?

By putting yourself first, it is possible to achieve and maintain balance and well-being in your life. If you don’t put yourself first, you will put others ahead of you, and this will detract from your own balance.

How can you put yourself (including your health and well-being) first?

There are lots of ways to put yourself first, but here are a few of my top tips:

*Realize that your needs are just as important as anyone else’s – Many of us regularly put other people’s needs ahead of our own, believing that their needs are more important. We often do this because we all want to be liked and even loved by others. This is especially the case if you have low self-worth, and so if you can relate to this, then you need to work on accepting and loving yourself more fully. This includes practising self-compassion. Essentially you need to believe that your health and well-being are worth fighting for – and they are! This is so important to acknowledge because it’s only once you can do this that you can give yourself permission to put yourself first. And it’s only once you do that, that you are able to be the best version of yourself.

*Set up your Non-Negotiable’s – Most of us live busy lives these days and that’s ok, just as long as you don’t let ‘busyness’ become an excuse for not putting yourself first. A great way to do this is to create some non-negotiable’s. These are things which you must do (your top priorities) regardless of what else is going on in your day. For example, some of my daily non-negotiable’s include; 1hr of exercise, 2hrs for cooking and enjoying a meal, 8 hours sleep time, 1.5hrs undivided attention with my kids, 1/2hr relax and unwind time. And in the hours I have left in-between these activities, I then do what I need to do and that’s often a lot. In-fact, I live a crazy busy life, but the difference is that my busyness is rooted in being/well-being, instead of doing/ill-being – and this makes all of the difference.

If you’re not sure what your non-negotiable’s should be, start with all of the attributes of what you chew and do, because they are all essential to living a more balanced life. Once you figure these out, then literally block out time on your calendar to do them. Possibly use one colour for work/available time and another colour for your non-negotiable/unavailable time. Then ensure that you stick to it. On the odd occasion where this slides, instead of getting angry at yourself, just look at what you can do next time to better protect your non-negotiable time.

I also strongly suggest you become a morning person if you are not already one – this is often the best time to get things done when you are busy.

*Get really good at saying ‘No’

‘Being busy is different to being over-committed which is what happens when you cannot say no.’

If there is one trait that all really successful people have in common, it’s that they are all good at saying ‘no.’ This is because they understand that time is a finite resource, meaning you really only have so much of it. It’s important to understand that every time you say ‘yes’ to something, you are effectively say ‘no’ to something else. For example, when you say yes to working overtime, then you may be saying no to cooking dinner, no to going to the gym, no to spending time with your kids, or anything else. In other words everything is a trade-off, and it’s ok to do this, just as long as your life is in balance. If not, then you need to get really good at saying no, which in the beginning, can be much more difficult than saying yes. This is because whilst trying not to care what other people think of us, we all want to be liked. And by saying no we think we are being selfish, but even worse, other people might think that we are being selfish.

So how do we get good at saying no? First you must have a go-to-response when people ask you for favours. Something simple like, “That doesn’t work for me at this time”—is sufficient. Saying no is also much easier to do when you reconnect with and are clear about your priorities – otherwise your reasons for saying no seem unimportant, and it’s easier just to say yes. It’s also important to tell the truth too – untrue excuses lead to further entanglements and greater stress. Lying sends your unconscious the message that there’s something wrong with saying no – which is untrue. Once you have made your decision then stick to it, instead of letting yourself being talked out of it. Do this by focusing on the good things that will come from saying no, and not the regret or guilt you might feel from saying yes when you really didn’t want to.

*Outsource – Outsourcing small portions of your life allows you to save time and spend it elsewhere – including on yourself. If you are over-committed and find it hard to get everything done, then sometimes it’s a good idea to hire some external help. This could include things like washing, ironing, cleaning, admin work, odd handyman jobs, or anything else. Websites such as airtasker have made this process easier and more affordable than ever before. Outsource everything that will lighten your load, simplify your life, and put yourself first without feeling bad about it.

*Listen to how you feel – Try to become more mindful of how you feel- both mentally and physically. Are you hydrated? Are you stressed? Are you tired? Are your muscles tight? Are you low on energy? By becoming more aware of how you feel, you can better monitor whether or not you are in balance. If you are not in balance, then you need to put yourself first, and less energy into everything else.

*Don’t wait forever to put yourself first – Many of us seem to be waiting for a clearing period in our life or that ‘one day’ where we will have the time, money and focus to put ourselves, including our well-being first. I know this because I coach people all of the time who eventually come and see me after a lifetime of always putting their well-being last. Often they are in such terrible shape – both physically and mentally, that it’s difficult to undo the many years of neglect.

If you were good at creating a clearing in your life, you would have had one by now. When was the last time you actually arrived at the perfect time and place, with all of the time, money and focus you needed? It’s a fairytale! Begin it now rather than waiting for all the lights to turn green.

Putting yourself first is essential when it comes to living a more balanced, and therefore a happier, healthier, fitter life. If you are not putting yourself first, then you are not living true – both to yourself and to the ones whom you love the most. Whilst putting yourself first may be difficult in the beginning, it quickly gets easier as you begin to realise just how much better your feel and function. So much so that you will begin to get annoyed at yourself when you haven’t put yourself first, at which point it will become habitual and part of your everyday lifestyle.

Q.Is your life in balance and if not, then when and how will you start putting yourself first?

Rob

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March 10, 2018 2 comments

Spend Time Outdoors

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How much time are we spending outdoors?

Compared to 20 years ago, adults are spending 30% less time outdoors, whilst children are spending 50% less time outdoors. This is ridiculous – prisoners spend more time outdoors! And it’s a trend which is getting worse.

Why are we spending less time outdoors?

There are many reasons why we are spending less time outdoors – getting lost in the world of social media and technology is one of the major ones. In-fact, we are spending an average of five hours daily on screen time/our mobile devices and an average of 50 minutes on applications such as Facebook alone. Pay TV only adds to our time spent indoors.

Many of the children born in the past 20 years have been connected to a computer before a field of grass, which has resulted in a generation with minimal appreciation for the outdoors and for movement in general. Many choose to be indoors even when they have the opportunity to be outside. Luckily, I grew up in a natural setting of which I am extremely grateful for, as I strongly believe that these early experiences have prevented me from getting sucked into the lure of the technological world.

An ever increasing population has also meant that our land sizes are decreasing and our backyards are shrinking.

Most of us also work longer hours, and spend more time commuting to and from work as congestion increases.

Fear of crime and increasing skin cancer rates have also had negative impacts on the amount of time we spend outdoors.

What happens when we don’t spend enough time outdoors?

Not spending enough time outdoors can result in;

Physical Consequences…

*Increased inflammation – resulting in autoimmune disorders, inflammatory bowel disease, depression, and cancer.

*Vitamin D deficiency – leading to things like osteoporosis, weakened immunity against bacteria/viruses, and obesity, etc. Every second person living in South Australia, NSW, Victoria and Tasmania are deficient in Vitamin D.

*Causes Poor Sleep/Insomnia – not spending enough time outdoors affects your internal clock/circadian rhythm and affects your melatonin levels– a hormone which helps you sleep.

*Delays recovery from injury/increases pain – Research shows that limited exposure to nature increases pain, illness and delays recovery time from both major surgery and minor health problems.

*Is bad for your lungs: Indoor air is 75% higher in pollutants, as well as positive ions (oxygen molecules with an extra electron) which have been linked to decreased sense of well-being, decreased alertness, increased anxiety and a higher resting heart rate.

*Decreases your immune system – For example: a lack of exposure to dirt increases your risk of developing type 2 diabetes.

*Poor Vision – a lack of outdoor exposure is creating a myopia epidemic – so much so that by the year 2050, the amount of people who are short sighted will grow from 4 million to 22 million.

*Exposes you to relentless noise pollution – which has been linked to higher blood pressure, stress, and even a heart attack.

*Shortens your life – people who spend less time outdoors have been shown to have poor overall health and longevity than those who do.

Mental Consequences…

*Increased stress and anxiety – by increasing levels of cortisol — a hormone often used as a marker for stress. The less time you spend in nature, the more time you spend in your head, and this results in increased stress and anxiety.

*Increases mental fatigue – less time in nature means less restorative time for your brain, resulting in decreased problem-solving skills, less creativity/imagination, weakened cognition, short-term memory loss, selective attention, decreased ability to multitask, and a decreased ability to concentrate or focus your attention on one task, which is linked to things like ADHD.

*Decreases your self-esteem and mood – not spending enough time in nature increases activity in a key region of the brain associated with depression.

Spend more time outdoors…

Whilst this may all sound bad, the good news is that all of these things can be easily avoided by making more time to be outdoors. We should all be aiming to spend an absolute minimum of a 1/2 to 1 hour outdoors each day. Some ways to do this include;

*Spend your lunch breaks outdoors rather than in the office or café.

*Instead of meeting with friends at a restaurant, meet in a park or beach instead.

*Take a daily walk after a meal either on your own or with a loved one.

*Take your children to a park instead of an indoor play centre!

*Read your favourite book outside instead of in.

*Consider getting a pet if you don’t already have one – as long as you are willing to spend outdoor time with it!

*Leave your car at home and walk wherever you can – to the shops, train station, etc.

*Play sport instead of watching it – either competitively or for fun/back yard cricket, etc.

*Buy kids toys which encourage active outdoors play time, as opposed to screen time.

*Get into your garden – it’s a great way to get connected to the earth.

*Implement a family hike day where you regularly explore new trails.

*Book holidays which involve the outdoors like camping/caravanning, bushwalking, swimming at the beach, etc.

*Exercise outdoors as much as possible rather than in a gym or your home.

*On sunny days, hang clothes outside instead of using the dryer.

*Restrict use/consumption of technology including TV, computers, tablets, phones, and other devices.

*Implement a ‘Tech Box’ where all technology is put into and not taken out until family time is spent outdoors.

*Try to have an office with a window to the outdoors.

*Bring the outdoors ‘indoors’ by putting plants in your home and office, and keeping doors to the outside open when possible.

*Create a beautiful outdoor space – you are more likely to spend time there if it is uplifting.

*Build an outdoor kitchen/BBQ and cook outdoors often.

*If you don’t have an outdoor job, then try to work outdoors as much as possible. This is easy if you have a laptop and can work from home.

As you increase your time outdoors, just remember to stay sun smart and stay hydrated. It is safe to go outside without sun protection early morning and late afternoon when the UV Index falls below 3.

The take home message…

We were never designed to live indoors, and that’s because nature is an inherent part of who we are. This is something that indigenous people from all parts of the world know. Spending time outdoors, and in nature, has the ability to transform and heal every aspect of our lives. Intuitively, we know this, which is why so many of us choose holiday destinations on the coast, in the hills or anywhere we can retreat to nature.

So what are you waiting for… start reaping the health benefits of being in nature and the great outdoors.

Q.What are some ways you spend your time outdoors?

Rob

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February 23, 2018 2 comments

WHAT YOU CHEW RECENT POSTS

Eat Vegetables

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Q.What’s the one thing that every successful diet in the world has in common? They all contain vegetables, and for good reason too…

Why is eating vegetables so important?

Vegetables contain essential vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, digestive enzymes and microbes, fibre and other nutrients. Any and all of these reduce acidity in the body and chronic inflammation, aiding vital nutrient absorption, stabilising blood sugar levels, keeping bowel movement regular and removing toxic waste, decreasing bad/increasing good cholesterol, decreasing blood pressure, feeding your healthy gut bacteria/microbiome and so on. Vegetables are also important because 80% of Australians are suffering from dehydration on a daily basis. And a big reason why this is the case is because we are eating more processed foods and less veggies than ever before, which also equates to less water in the diet. Veggies help to keep you hydrated and functioning at your best.

Veggies are also the key to losing excess weight, which is something most of us need. Veggies are low in energy and some even contain negative calories. You could eat 40 zucchinis a day and still lose weight. If you’re not eating enough veggies, you’re not supporting your weight loss goals.

We are eating less vegetables than ever before:

Despite the importance of eating veggies, 93% of Australians are not reaching the recommended daily intake of vegetables. That’s virtually the whole of Australia!

The main reason for this is because most of us live very busy lives, and as such we often reach for foods which are quick to prepare, including processed foods, pre-prepared meals and meat – especially chicken. Also, vegetables have become increasingly expensive. Whatever the reasons, it is a real concern, and we should all be trying harder to eat more veggies.

How many vegetables should you be eating?

Australian guidelines recommend that we eat 2 to 3 cups (5 to 6 serves) of vegetables per day. If you’re already eating veggies that’s great, but if not, then it may take some time to increase your veggie intake. Just start with one cup and increase from there. At the end of the day, you can’t eat ‘too many’ veggies, as long as you’re eating a healthy, balanced diet.

What is the healthiest way to prepare veggies?

The three natural destroyers of vitamins in vegetables are heat, light, and oxygen. However, some cooking some methods can help retain nutrients. As a general rule, it’s best to keep cooking time, temperature and the amount of liquid to a minimum. That’s why steaming is one of the best ways to cook most vegetables. Steam vegetables briefly until slightly tender. For example, asparagus and broccoli should retain their bright green colour. Click here for a full guide for optimum steaming times of veggies.

Boiling vegetables causes water soluble vitamins like vitamin C, B1 and folate to leach into the water, so unless you are planning on drinking the water, or using it in soups or stews like a stock, then avoid this method. Vegetables like peas, cauliflower and zucchini tend to be particularly susceptible to nutrient loss through boiling, losing more than 50% of their antioxidants.

Cooking veggies whole is often the best choice to preserve nutrients. When that’s not practical, be sure to cut them into large uniform pieces that will cook evenly. And only wash your vegetables just before you cut them as washing before storing may promote bacterial growth and speed up spoilage.

Sautéing in a bit of healthy cooking oil, such as extra-virgin olive oil, is also a great way to cook many vegetables. Not only does it maximize flavour, but the addition of olive oil “appears to increase the absorption of phytonutrients like phenols and carotenes,” That’s because many of the vitamins and nutrients in vegetables are fat soluble, meaning your body absorbs them better in the presence of fat.

However with that said, eating raw instead of cooked vegetables, means you’ll get more of vitamins A and C. These vitamins are heat-sensitive, meaning high temperatures and longer cooking times degrade or destroy them.

So, as you can see, there are numerous ways to prepare veggies to maintain their nutrient content. Eat plenty of vegetables of every colour, and either cook them in different ways, or enjoy them raw.

How to store vegetables:

Nutrients in vegetables start to break down after harvest. Proper storage helps to minimize the loss of nutrients and increase shelf life. Here are some tips for storing your veggies:

*To reduce shrivelling or wilting due to water loss, keep leafy and root vegetables, such as silverbeet, broccoli, carrots and parsnips, in perforated plastic bags, preferably in the refrigerator.

*By removing leafy tops from carrots, parsnips, turnips and beetroot, their storage life can be extended many weeks or even several months in the refrigerator.

*Keep potatoes in a cool, dark, well ventilated place to avoid greening and sprouting. Remove from plastic bags and place in a strong paper bag, box or in a wire or plastic bin.

*Sweet potatoes should not be kept in the fridge as they are cold sensitive.

*To reduce mould growth on onions, whole pumpkin, marrows and squashes, store at room temperature under dry conditions, in a net or loose.

*Limit storage time. Fresh is best when it comes to taste and nutrition. If you want to store produce items for a longer time, consider freezing them.

*It is best not to wash vegetables until you are ready to consume them to reduce spoilage and mould growth.

*Don’t slice vegetables until you are ready to use them. When a vegetable is sliced, it exposes the cut surfaces to heat, light, and oxygen — the nutrient destroyers.

*If you grow your own, it’s best to pick veggies just before you need to use them.

Ways to eat more veggies:

*Add lots of veggies to pasta dishes – instead of serving just pasta, serve an equal portion of veggies with the pasta and then pour your sauce on top.

*Add veggies into your favourite pasta sauces or anything else. Often, adding just a few cups doesn’t change the flavour enough to notice. You can add things like wilted spinach or zucchini to almost anything.

*Try to make pasta out of veggies like zucchini, and pizza bases out of cauliflower.
*Roast off assorted veggies with your favourite spices like rosemary, thyme or anything else.

*Make frittata/omelettes – you can use precooked/leftover veggies.

*Make pasties, pies and sausage rolls – you can use leftovers/precooked veggies.

*Make a béchamel sauce, place on top of it some steamed broccoli or cauliflower and top with grated cheese. Bake in the oven for a delicious side dish.

*Add loads of veggies to your favourite stir-fry recipes.

*Chargrill veggies and add olive oil, garlic, and spices.

*Steam or boil veggies and add your favourite sauce. E.g. Steamed Bok Choy with Oyster sauce.

*Make different casseroles or stews and load them with veggies.

*Make smoothies packed with veggies and disguise the flavour with fruit if you don’t like the taste of just veggies. As a rule, use a ratio of 4 veggies to 1 fruit to avoid too much sugar. Juice vegetables whole to maximise the fibre and roughage content.

*Use supplements or powders like spirulina or wheatgrass which can be added to smoothies or meals to boost the nutrient content. These are also a great alternative when you do not have access to veggies/travelling/etc.

*Cut veggie sticks like celery, carrots, cucumber, capsicum, zucchini, mushroom and serve with your favourite vegetarian dips like hummus or tzatziki.

*Make soups – this is literally as simple as blending your favourite vegetable combinations.

*Make salads (especially in the warmer months). The key here is to get creative instead of just boring old iceberg lettuce.

*Ferment and Pickle Veggies – not only are they delicious, but also great for your gut health too.

Other tips regarding veggies:

*There are many different ways to prepare the same vegetable, depending upon what culture you are from. Try taking your favourite vegetables and preparing them in a completely different way. Even using different herbs and spices can completely change the flavour.

*Aim to consume vegetables as soon as possible to maximise nutrient content. This means that you should shop for veggies twice per week.

*Try to eat organic vegetables, local produce or grow your own. Avoid genetically modified vegetables where possible – it is unknown whether they are safe.

*Eat what veggies are in season as they are often fresher, cheaper and healthier.

*Whilst fresh vegetables are best, snap frozen vegetables are a great substitute if used occasionally.

*Think outside of the square – there are literally thousands of different types of vegetables available. Try something new instead of always eating the same vegetables.

*Whilst all vegetables are nutritious, the five ‘super veggies’ that I highly recommend are purple sweet potatoes, beetroot, kale, broccoli and onions.

*It is a good idea to consult your GP, nutritionist or dietician when modifying your diet.

Q.Are you eating enough veggies? If so, how do you prepare and eat them?

Rob

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February 9, 2018 0 comment

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Take responsibility for yourself

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What does taking responsibility for yourself really mean?

Taking responsibility for yourself means being accountable for everything which is within your power or control. It’s about doing the things you are expected to do and owning the negative or positive outcomes of your thoughts and actions. This includes self-respect, that you respect yourself enough, and that you are truthful with yourself. And most importantly, it’s about realizing that you always have a choice; knowing that different decisions will lead you to different outcomes.

Why is it important to take responsibility for yourself?

Research tells us that out of anything, the biggest determinant of success in life is having strong ‘self-control.’ Taking responsibility for yourself is important because if you don’t, then any problems you may have remain outside of yourself, and with that out of your own control. You are literally giving away your personal power to external forces, rendering you powerless towards positive change.

This is better known as having a ‘victim’ mentality. Victims often have the outlook that life is not up to them but rather that it is just happens ‘around’ or ‘to’ them. They tend to go around in circles doing the same things again even if it doesn’t work. They often complain and blame anyone or anything else other than themselves for their dissatisfaction of life. This could include the economy, the weather, an injury, a past relationship, their parents, their age or anything else in their environment. After all, it’s much easier to play the blame game, than to take responsibility for their own success. This often becomes a habit for most, and so they continue to sit around feeling sorry for themselves and waiting for their life to change instead of engaging in it which is a real waste. And then before they know it, life ends up passing them by.

In contrast, when you take responsibility for yourself, then change not only becomes possible, but inevitable. That’s because when you stand in your own power, you naturally become empowered towards positive change. And with this, new solutions and opportunities begin to arise. In-fact, the moment you accept responsibility for yourself is the same moment you gain the power to change anything in your life.

Sure, sometimes life hands us a lemon, but we can either choose to be bitter about it or choose to ‘make lemonade.’ By make lemonade, I mean that we have to make the most of the situation; we have to find the best way out, the opportunity and the solution in there, as there is always something we can do. And whilst we definitely can’t control everything in life, we can control the way we respond, and this is the key. It is only by taking responsibility for our self, that we can begin to consciously co-create the life that we want, instead of the one that we don’t.

Taking responsibility helps you to attract what you want

When you take responsibility for yourself, then you begin to focus on the things you want and need to do. And once you do, then a remarkable thing starts to happen – you begin to attract more of the things you want and less of the things you don’t. This is the opposite to those who have a victim mentality, who are unconsciously creating what they do not want. This is why it is also important to trust and believe in the magic of life – because the world will provide for you what you want or need, but only once you take responsibility for and begin working towards it.

In saying that, you can’t just sit around and expect things to come to you or for your life to change. Nothing else, or no-one else can make you happy, healthy and fit; you have to do it yourself! Sure let others help you, but at the end of the day the buck stops with you. No one is going to save you – not even God. Instead, you need to take 100% responsibility and initiative for yourself. Stop blaming your circumstances and outside influences on what you are able to change. Remember, if you want results then you can’t have excuses. When you come to a point of awareness you cannot ignore this – with knowledge comes responsibility. The universe is giving you an opportunity to grow. If you know better, then you must rise to the challenge and be better. Taking responsibility for yourself is a very liberating way to live your life, because suddenly you are in control of it – and that is so powerful.

When not to take responsibility

Whilst we can control many things, we cannot control everything. Doing so can make us too self-critical and affect both our self-worth and our self-efficacy. So please, don’t take responsibility for anything out of your control. This includes most things which are outside of yourself. Something that many of us often take responsibility for when we shouldn’t is other people. And it can be hard not too, especially when they are people whom we really love and care about.

I say this because most of us struggle to find the time and energy to manage our own life, let alone being responsible for and worrying about other people’s lives too. Instead, give yourself permission to detach and let others own their own life. By doing so, you will free yourself up to live your own life without feeling drained all of the time.

Obviously the exception to this is if you are a carer for someone who has special needs, is unwell, or if you have younger kids, who are dependent upon your love, support and guidance to thrive and even survive. However this also comes with a cautionary warning too – don’t shelter or try to rescue your kids too much otherwise they will grow up with very little resilience, which is what we are facing a generation off today. Instead give them some responsibility, let them learn and grow from their mistakes and then give them a little more. All you can do is teach them to be responsible for themselves, and then they have to walk and own their own path in life. As they do, they will learn their own lessons because experience is the greatest teacher.

Many people try to avoid responsibility for their bad behaviours by blaming others for causing it. It’s probably a good idea to stay away from people who can’t take responsibility for their own actions. You cannot accept blame or try to fix things for them when you’ve done nothing wrong. They need to learn that if they want different outcomes they will have to make different choices. Eventually they will run out of things or people to blame at which point they will only be able to blame themselves.

It’s all up to you

Remember you cannot blame anything or anyone else for where you are at in life right now. Through your own choices, you are responsible – no-one else. Simply accept and learn from your mistakes and move on with your life. Whilst everything that has happened to you up until now has influenced who you are today, you are responsible for who you will become tomorrow. So whatever it is you want to do – lose weight, become healthier, do your dream job, build wealth, travel, meet a partner, it all starts with taking responsibility for yourself. Each day is a new opportunity to create this for yourself. You can have a victim mentality or a victorious mentality – it’s your choice, but I know which one I choose. As long as you are always trying to better yourself then you can’t go wrong.

What do you need to take responsibility in your life for today, that will help you live a happier, healthier, fitter tomorrow?

Rob

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January 25, 2018 6 comments

Set Goals

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Why is it important to have goals?

If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail – Benjamin Franklin

Research clearly shows that people who make consistent progress toward meaningful goals live happier, more satisfied lives than those who don’t. And this is largely because having goals allows you to steer your life in the direction you choose. Sure, you may already be setting and working towards certain goals, such as getting a job promotion or saving for a holiday. But are you setting goals for ‘all’ of the other areas in your life which are important to you?

I say this because so often, I coach people who have gotten to their 40s, 50s, and 60s, only to find that their health is failing, their marriage is broken, their doing a job that they are not passionate about, or sometimes all three. Or it could be any other less than desirable state that they look up and find themselves in, one which is far away from where they thought they would be at this point in their lives.

This is because they have gotten caught in the drift of life – where life has taken them along for the ride, instead of them dictating where they wanted their life to go. Sure, we can’t control everything that happens in life, but we can work towards a future we want to create.

If you can relate to any of this then the first thing to do is to acknowledge where you are at today/your current reality. Are you where you should or want to be in any area of your life –relationships, health, finances or anything else? If not, then don’t beat yourself up – that’s fine. You simply need to acknowledge where you are at, to get to where you want to go. Remember it’s never too late to get back on track – regardless of how far you have drifted off course.

Next you need to decide what you want to create for yourself. This is where you need to let yourself dream a little. What do you want your health to look like? What kind of relationships do you want to enjoy? What kind of work do you want to do? And anything else. Write it down.

Once you have decided where you want to be, then you can start working towards steering yourself in the direction you want to go. And you do this by setting some goals and working towards them.

Here are some important tips towards setting goals;

Set SMART goals – which is an acronym for meeting the following criteria:

Specific—your goals must identify exactly what you want to accomplish, with as much specificity as possible.

Bad: Get healthy.
Good: Start exercising and stop smoking.

Measurable—you can’t manage what you can’t measure, so ensure that your goal is quantifiable.

Bad: Take up running.
Good: Do a 5km fun run.

Actionable—every goal should start with an action verb (finish/quit/run/etc.) rather than a to-be verb (be/have/am/etc.).

Bad: Be more consistent with eating veggies.
Good: Eat 2 cups of veggies every day.

Realistic—Set goals which will push you out of your comfort zone, but at the same time are not unachievable.

Bad: Cycle in the ‘Le Tour De France.’
Good: Participate in ‘Cycle Around the Bay.’

Time-Framed—A goal without a date is just a dream. Make sure that every goal ends with a by when date.

Bad: Lose 10 kg.
Good: Lose 10 kg by June 30.

An example of a goal with all of the SMART criteria would include;

I will walk for 30 minutes, 5 days every week, by the 15^th of January.

Set some goals around health: The first place you should start to set some goals around is your health – because without it nothing else matters. The best goals to set around health, are all of the attributes which I talk about in the 3 keys; if you are not doing some or all of these things, then you already have some essential goals to work towards (well until they become lifestyle habits anyway).

Write down and keep your goals in clear view: When you write something down, you are stating your intention and setting things in motion. Also ensure to keep your goals in clear view. Some ways you can do this is to save your goals as your screen saver, stick them on your fridge, your desk or any other place you frequent daily.

Review goals frequently: Ensure to review your goals daily, weekly, or monthly. This will keep you inspired and ensure you remain on track towards achieving your goals. If you find that are not achieving your goals, then work out why. It could be as simple as changing your strategy. Or sometimes it’s because we have conflicting values which take us further away rather than closer to our goals. For example, if your goal is to lose weight but you enjoy a glass of wine most nights of the week, then you need to decide on what you want more.

Don’t have too many goals: Productivity studies show that we really can’t focus on more than 5 to 7 items at one time. Any more and you will find yourself spread too thin, doing many things and excelling in none. Trust me, I have been a master of this in the past, and you won’t really accomplish anything. So just focus on a few goals which you most want to accomplish right now.

So remember, whilst most of us have dreams, these dreams don’t just happen – you have to have some kind of intentionality and goals in place to make it happen. But more than that, you need to work towards your goals – and I say that because a lot of people live in the “dream of, would of, could of, should of”, but never do what’s actually required to achieve them. And it’s these same people who continue to get caught in the drift of life. But by regularly setting and working towards your goals, you can take control of, and steer your life in any direction you choose. Everyday becomes an opportunity to move toward your destination.

Do you set goals and what works for you?

Rob

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January 12, 2018 0 comment

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Plan and Prepare Meals in Advance

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Given the busyness of life today, many of us struggle to find the time let alone the energy, to prepare and eat a healthy meal three times a day, every day of the week. And you know what, I don’t blame you – especially if you have a family to cook for too.

However, by pre-paring meals in advance (meal prepping) we can avoid this constant struggle, and eat healthier meals more consistently. Here are a few tips to help get you started…

Make a plan of what you want to eat – Make a list of your favourite foods, then find recipes which are not only simple, but which can be made quickly or in bulk. You will also need to decide on what you are going to eat for snacks between meals. Simply write down 7 healthy breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack ideas right now, and you already have your first week done. Then do the same thing again for next week. Once you have a few weekly menus worked out, then you can rotate them to keep things interesting.

Know what you need to buy – Once you have worked out what you want to eat, then write or even type out all of the ingredients into a shopping list which you can re-use each week. This way, you won’t waste time doing multiple trips to the supermarket each week. It will also mean that you are less likely to buy things which you don’t really need – including junk foods! This not only means you won’t have to use your willpower to avoid eating junk when it’s in your pantry, but it also cuts down on waste.

Dedicate specific time towards meal prep – Ensure to dedicate specific time to prepare some of your meals ahead of time. This could be one evening during the week, a Sunday afternoon, or whatever time works for you. You can do this weekly, fortnightly or even monthly. I like to do a combination of all of these.

Use your freezer – The best thing about using the freezer is that you can often cook in larger quantities and less frequently too. We do this with soups, casseroles (e.g. apricot chicken) and bolognaise sauce (which we serve with pasta or make lasagne). Prep wise: chop up ingredients that are suitable for freezing into appropriate portion sizes and freeze until required. We buy fresh seafood (Australian salmon, calamari, prawns and fish), chop it up, mix and portion it out into bags for marinara mix which we use for pasta, pizza, risotto, paella and on the BBQ. We have a whole second freezer dedicated towards meal prepped foods.

Meal prep what is in season – Eating what’s in season is not only better for you, but it’s often cheaper too. For example, we like to chargrill and pickle capsicums and eggplants – if we do this in bulk when they are in season it costs us about $30 for 10kg. Out of season the same amount would cost us up to $130. Also if you grow your own and have lots of produce ready all at once, then this is great opportunity to meal prep for future use and reduce waste.

Use left-overs for lunch – Where possible, cook extra for dinner and use left-overs for lunch the next day. This eliminates the need to worry about what to have for lunch most days of the week which is a huge time saver. Or if you prefer, instead of having dinner left overs for lunch, you can also use them to prepare a different meal the next day. For example, the day after having a roast, we either use the left over veggies to make pasties the next night, or the chicken in fried rice. The ideas are endless.

Jump on the juicing bandwagon – If you’re short on eating fruit and veggies, then juicing may be for you. The secret here is to juice more veggies as opposed to just fruit, which can be high in sugar. If you are trying to lose weight then substituting one meal for a juice is fine, otherwise use juicing as a healthy snack. Plan out what combos you like and prepare the fruit and veggies in advance so all you have to do is blitz it. You can get an excellent blender these days for less than $200 that will turn just about anything into juice.

Food prep for your gut too – We all know the importance of maintaining gut health when it comes to being healthy, so ensure that you prepare meals that feed your gut too. Fermented foods are best for this. Our staples are Kefir (2min prep time for next day supply) and Kombucha (15min prep time for 2 week supply), but it doesn’t matter what you choose – yoghurt, sauerkraut, or anything else, as long as you’re maintaining healthy gut bacteria.

Keep snacks simple – When thinking snacks, choose things that are simple, easy to prepare, and nutritious. Fresh fruit, a shake, hard-boiled eggs, a tub of yoghurt and pre-cut veggies with prepared hummus are all great choices.

Look for shortcuts – If you’re really pressed for time, then look for shortcuts such as buying pre-cut veggies and fruits, or pre-cooked meats like roast chicken. Canned foods are quick too, such as tuna or beans, which can be used to make lots of things.

Have the right equipment – If you are going to be cooking on mass, then you need to make sure that you have the right equipment. Things like large stockpots and frying pans, maybe a slow cooker if you like using those will all make it easier for you to do this. Having a good set of knives, and so on will ensure that you can prepare meals more efficiently too. You usually get what you pay for, so buy the best you can afford.

Invest in food storage containers – If you don’t already have them, then ensure to invest in some quality food storage containers of various sizes to suit your needs, as this will make a world of difference. Try to use glass, otherwise if using plastic, make sure it’s BPA-free and ensure it won’t melt in the microwave or dishwasher. However, no plastic is really safe. For easy storage, choose one container type and buy several that stack and store neatly.

At the end of the day, meal prep is done to not only make your life easier, but to maintain health through sound nutrition. By making a small investment in time to pre-prepare your meals, you will have more time to focus on all of the other things required to live a happier, healthier fitter life.

So tell me, do you meal prep and if so what works for you?

Robert

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December 29, 2017 0 comment

RECENT POSTS LIVING TRUE

Be The Bigger Person

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What is being the bigger person?

Many of us have heard about the notion ‘be the bigger person,’ but what does this really mean? Well it definitely doesn’t mean eating more. Put simply, being the bigger person means to live and interact in the world in a way which better allows us to get along with each other. The result being more peaceful, rewarding and meaningful relationships in our life.

Why is it important to be the bigger person?

If you are not being the bigger person, then chances are that you are experiencing conflict within your relationships to some degree. How many families and friends do you know whom are free of conflict of some sort? Be it the royals, celebrities, or anyone else, most are riddled with drama. Whether it’s a sibling not talking to a parent, this friend not talking to that friend, that partner not talking to their ex, or anything else. And it’s a similar story within workplaces too. The fact that there are so many lonely people within families is a real tragedy.

Apart from the damage this does to relationships, the stress of these interactions can literally suck the energy out of you and rob you of joy in each and every moment. And this is true regardless of the fact that it may have been in the past, if you try not to think about it, or even if you no longer see the person anymore/have removed yourself from the situation. In this way, it is important that you strive to be the bigger person, because doing so allows you to live more in the now and enjoy life, which equates to a happier, healthier, fitter you. It’s simple – the more we get along the less stressed we are.

How can we be the bigger person?

At its core, being the bigger person is largely about compassion and understanding, and there are lots of ways we can do this, but here are a few of the key ones…

Act, don’t React

The key here is to know what ‘pushes your buttons.’ Instead of getting upset with the other person/situation (both of which are powerless without your reaction) and getting drawn into their ‘stuff,’ step back and take a deep breath whilst trying to remain calm. This will prevent your actions following any undesirable thoughts in your head. Remember, rise above instead of sinking down to their level. If you have anything negative to say then instead of reacting don’t say anything at all – instead simply go quite. As you do this, try to just listen and remain curious and by doing so you will better able to connect with the why they are reacting/behaving that way they are/see the situation for what it is. They could just be having a bad day, or it could be something deeper where they are acting from a place of fear. If this is the case then try to have compassion for them. Not only will this make you feel better by not losing your cool and giving your power/energy away, but by not reacting you will also teach them about balance and compassion too. Try to be slow to anger and quick to forgive.

Don’t Personalize Things

We often get hurt when we personalise things such as negative comments or actions from others. And the moment you personalise things, is the moment you react. What we need to realise is that none of these things should ever be taken personally. When you know and live true to who you are, then very little of what people say or do, will affect you. In other words you no longer personalise anything – it’s like ‘Water off a ducks back’. This is partly due to the fact that you are no longer subconsciously seeking their approval and are no longer concerned whether you are liked or not. It’s also due to the fact that as you get to know more about yourself then you also become much more understanding of others too. Ensure to always spend some time each week learning more about your true nature and eventually you will find that being the bigger person will come more naturally to you. The more work we do on ourselves, the more we operate from our heart centre instead of our rational mind, and the more compassionate we become.

Forgive

Forgiveness is something which so many people struggle with, and often because they cannot come to grips with the hurt caused. But the reality is that anyone who has ever done anything to hurt you or your loved ones has done so because they simply know no better. This includes the fact that they have been hurt themselves – hurt people hurt others. You might think that they know better, but if they really did, then they wouldn’t have hurt you in the first place. So regardless of what situation or injustice has happened in your life and how unfair it may seem, you need to let it go. Remember, the reason to forgive, has nothing to do with the other person, but rather is for your own sake. And you can’t get the last 24 hours back let alone the last 10 years so don’t hold onto grudges. So say to the people in your life what you need to because otherwise it may be too late… Never would off, could off, should off – instead forgive them and let go. Forgiving another person doesn’t mean you need to be their friend – you may still dislike them and that’s ok.

We all know people who wouldn’t apologize even if they chopped of your arm and we have to be careful here that we don’t sit in self-righteous resentment instead of forgiveness. This is where we won’t forgive first out of the need to be right, prove a point or because we are scared that the person will not forgive us back. Don’t try and point score – instead be the first to forgive. It takes a big person to forgive someone who has not admitted that they may have done wrong or who hasn’t apologized, but doing so frees you up to live your life by bringing you back into your power. It also helps them get on with their life too. You know you have truly forgiven someone or yourself when you remember it without having bitterness, as well as having a sense a gratitude for having learnt the lessons you have learnt.

Often the hardest person to forgive in life is ourselves. If you have done something to hurt another then stop wasting energy trying to cover your mistakes and instead acknowledge your wrongs and own it. People are generally very forgiving because we all make mistakes and it’s not what you do wrong but rather your unwillingness to deal with it that makes people angry. People don’t have much tolerance with people who refuse to be honest – no one expects you to be perfect!

Don’t judge

Sometimes we are quick to judge others because we focus on what makes us different, including things like our body, job, age, wealth, education or anything else. Instead, we should focus on what makes us similar, like the fact that we all have two eyes, one heart, and we all came from and will eventually return back to the same place when we pass over. As we do this, then those small differences become something to be celebrated, rather than frowned upon. In-fact, it’s what makes the world so interesting. ‘Namaste’ is a Sanskrit word which roughly translates to ‘the God in me sees the god in you.’ Can you look at others and see the God in them? And can you love them the way that God loves you? This has nothing to do with religion.

Another way we can be less judgemental is to remember that everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. In-fact, we are all suffering, some just more so than others. There is always more than meets the eye because everyone has a story, so never judge and assume anything about anyone. By doing so you will find out a lot more about who they are/their situation, instead of just hearing what you want to hear. This also includes not gossiping about others too.

Often the person we judge the most is ourselves, and most of the time we don’t even realise we are doing it. Be mindful of negative self-talk, and stop being so hard on yourself. As long as you are doing your best in everything that you do, you cannot do any more than that.

Being the bigger person is not about doing the easy thing, it’s about doing the right thing. The key is to be intentional about being so – to choose to have peace and harmonious relationships in your life, instead of drama. So think about your own life, and what you need to do to be the bigger person.

Leave a Comment

Q.Is there a situation in your life where you have been the bigger person? I’m sure there are many, I’d like to hear your thoughts.

Merry Christmas

Rob

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December 15, 2017 4 comments

Blog RECENT POSTS WHAT YOU DO

Get Regular Medical Check-Ups

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Anyone who owns a car knows that you need to service it on a regular basis to ensure that it runs smoothly and without problems. Well the same is true for your health too – regardless of your age, regular health check-ups can help find potential health problems before they become more problematic, and help you to live a happier, healthier, fitter life. Prevention is always better than cure.

But what tests should we really be doing? The best answer to this is to see your doctor, as there are various factors which influence what tests they will recommend, dependent mainly upon your age and your potential risk factors including family history. However as a general guide consider the following;

20s RISKS

Instead of waiting until your 50s to see your doctor, it’s important to start regular health check-ups in your 20s to catch danger signs early.

Women:

Melanoma, HPV PAPILLOMAVIRUS (leading cause of cervical cancer), High Cholesterol, Breast Cancer

Men:

Melanoma, Testicular Cancer, High Cholesterol

POSSIBLE TESTS:

Women:

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

Blood Pressure check every doctor visit

Pelvic Exam and Pap Smear annually after age of 25yrs

Cholesterol test every 5 years, starting at age 20

Self Breast Examination (you doctor can teach you how to do this)

General chat about your mental health

Men:

Self-Testicular Exam annually after age 20 (your doctor can teach you how to do this)

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

Cholesterol test every 5 years, starting at age 20.

General chat about your mental health

30s RISKS

Both men and women are at a greater risk for Heart Disease and Type 2 Diabetes after age 30.

Women:

Cervical Cancer, Breast Cancer, Type 2 Diabetes

Men:

Type 2 Diabetes, Melanoma, Testicular Cancer, Colorectal Cancer, Heart Disease

POSSIBLE TESTS:

Women:

Pelvic Exam and Pap Smear annually for cervical abnormalities

Breast Exam annually for women with family history of cancer

Blood sugar test every 5 years/annually if overweight

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

General chat about your mental health

Men:

Blood sugar test every 5 years/annually if overweight

Cholesterol testing every 5 years

Annual testicular exam

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

Screenings for colorectal and prostate cancer if high risk

General chat about your mental health

40s RISKS

The affects of physical aging become more pronounced , and both men and women are at an increased risk of many forms of cancer.

Women:

Heart Disease, Breast Cancer, Ovarian Cancer

Men:

Heart Disease, Colorectal Cancers, Male Cancers including Prostate and Testicular

POSSIBLE TESTS:

Women:

Bone density testing every 3 years if at risk of osteoporosis

Blood sugar testing and cholesterol testing annually to detect/prevent heart disease

Annual mammogram for all women

Ovarian screening for post-menopaused/high risk women every 3 years

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

General chat about your mental health

Men:

Blood sugar test every 3 years

Heart disease screening every 5 years – annually if high risk

Colorectal screening annually

Prostate exam if high risk or experiencing symptoms such as trouble urinating or pelvic pain

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

General chat about your mental health

50s RISKS

Your risk for heart disease, many cancers, stroke and Type 2 diabetes increases exponentially.

Women:

Osteoporosis, Colon Cancer, Ovarian Cancer, Heart Disease, Stroke

Men:

Heart Disease, Prostate Cancer, Colon Cancer, Stroke

POSSIBLE TESTS:

Women:

Bone density testing every 3 years

Ovarian screening every 3 years

Blood sugar testing every 3 years/annually if overweight or at high risk

Colorectal screening every 5 years

Coronary screening annually including EKG

Continued annual skin exams, pelvic exams, pap smears and mammograms

General chat about your mental health

Men:

Prostate cancer screening every 3 years. Annually if high risk

Cholesterol testing annually

Annual skin check by doctor/dermatologist for signs of skin cancer

Colon cancer screening every 3 years. Annually if high risk

Continue testicular exams every 3 years

General chat about your mental health

60s+ RISKS

Your risk of Type 2 Diabetes decreases for both men and women after 60, while the risks for heart disease and many cancers increases sharply.

Women:

Osteoporosis, Colorectal Cancer, Stroke, Heart Disease

Men:

Prostate Cancer, Colon Cancer, Stroke.

POSSIBLE TESTS:

Women:

Colorectal screening every 3 years

Bone density testing every 2-3 years

Colonoscopy screening every 5 years

The following should be continued annually:

Mammogram, Pelvic Exam, Pap Smears at Doctors discretion, Coronary Screening, Skin check

General chat about your mental health

Men:

The following should be done annually:

Cholesterol testing, Coronary screening, Prostate exam, Skin check

Colorectal screening every 3 years

General chat about your mental health

By building a relationship with your doctor, they will better be able to assist you in all aspects of your well-being including your mental health. Your doctor can also refer you to all other allied health professionals for further advice/testing if required. If you are not happy with your doctor or don’t connect then find one which you do connect with.

It’s also a great idea to pencil in an annual time to have a check-up, such as a day before your birthday so that you don’t forget. Obviously if your workplace has in-house regular medical check-ups, then you won’t have to worry about this.

So I’m interested to know, do you get regular medical check-ups, and if not why?

Rob

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November 30, 2017 0 comment

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Drink Enough Clean Water

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Water is the source of all life:

Did you know that there are in excess of 60 billion planets in our galaxy alone which could potentially support life? And this is because all of these planets contain one essential compound called ‘water,’ which dissolves and transports chemicals causing important metabolic reactions needed to sustain all life. Essentially, water is the source of all life and without it nothing can exist.

Why is water so important to us:

Given that your body is around 70% water, it’s critical to keep hydrated to ensure that it functions properly. There are many benefits of drinking water but here are some of the main ones;

Water…

*Helps to maintain electrolyte balance including things like sodium and potassium which are all essential to every day function. This includes things like keeping your blood pressure stable, regulating your heart beat, providing energy to get through the day and by allowing your muscles to contract properly. And if you’ve ever tried to exercise whilst dehydrated or even worse hung over, then you’d know how hard it is to get moving.

*Prevents illness – by helping your body to maintain a healthy PH (water is neutral) and also by helping your body to flush out toxins, reduce bad bacteria and infections, which can lead to more serious forms of disease.

*Prevents mental health issues – in many cases, things like anxiety and depression can be alleviated simply by staying hydrated.

*Helps to keep your skin hydrated – this leads to healthier skin which not only helps you to look younger but also helps to prevent things like acne too.

*Aids digestion – water keeps things flowing through your intestinal tract and kidneys keeping you regular which is so important.

*Is great for lots of other things such as decreasing headaches, preventing kidney stones, losing weight and much more.

How much water do we need:

We are constantly losing water primarily through our sweat and urine, so it needs to be replaced. Everybody is different, but it is recommended that we need to be drinking around 2+ litres of water per day. This is known as the 8×8 rule – 8 glasses 8 times per day. Obviously, if you are exercising or if the weather is warm you will probably need more than this. I drink about 3+litres per day and find that works for me. The best advice is to listen to your body, but in doing so, also don’t rely on your thirst mechanism which is not a reliable indicator of hydration. This is because by the time your mouth is dry and you feel thirsty, you are already dehydrated (and usually by about 4+ glasses). By drinking water regularly instead of waiting to feel thirsty, you can ensure that you don’t become dehydrated.

It’s also important to realise that it is easy for your brain to mistake thirst for hunger, when in actual fact it’s your body just craving water. Instead, be mindful of how you feel and function. Before you feel thirsty, some other signs you can look for to determine if you are dehydrated include fatigue, confusion, muscle aches, stomach and joint pain. You can also monitor the colour of your urine; generally if its darker then you may be dehydrated.

Few of us are drinking enough water:

Despite the importance of drinking enough water, 80% of us are failing to do so. We are also consuming much less water in what we eat than we once did too. This is because processed foods, which today have become somewhat the norm, virtually have all of the water sucked out of them. This is the opposite to whole foods like vegetables which are full of water. But other than advising you to eat more veggies, here are some common reasons for not drinking enough water and how to overcome them.

Some common reasons for not drinking enough water and how to overcome them:

I’m too busy/I forget – sure we are all busy, but none of us are too busy to drink enough water. The key here is to remain mindful of the need to drink water throughout the day and then just be intentional about doing so. Carry a reusable bottle of water with you and even set yourself a reminder until you make it a habit.

I don’t like the taste of water – this is incorrect because water has no taste. If it does, then chances are that you’re tasting the impurities in the water itself, because clean fresh water should have no taste. The best advice is to drink filtered water to remove many of the nasties found in tap water such as chlorine, fluoride, bacteria, pesticides, nitrates, lead, rust, aluminium, mercury, hydrocarbons, unpleasant odours and so on. You will need to invest in a good water filter – either a freestanding filter or a plumbed in water filtration system. You could also just get portable filter which is especially good if you need to fill up when you are on the go. Also ensure your bottle is made from BPA free plastic, glass or food grade stainless steel is ok, to further avoid dangerous plastics and metals from leaching into your water. If you still don’t like the taste of plain water, then try squeezing fruit juice into your water such as fresh lemons or oranges.

I don’t feel thirsty – remember, as I mentioned earlier, if your thirsty it’s too late – you need to drink water regularly instead of waiting to feel thirsty, to ensure that you don’t become dehydrated.

I don’t want to put on weight – it’s funny but yes some of us believe that water causes weight gain, when if actual fact the opposite is true. Fat cells contain lots of toxins and as you lose weight, many of these toxins are being released into your body and are processed by your liver. If you don’t drink enough water then your liver will not be able to flush them out, working against weight loss. Also, if you aim to drink 1-2 glasses of water before every meal, you will find that you need much less food and with it less calories to satisfy you – resulting in accelerated fat loss.

I drink enough water in other beverages – coffee/tea, soft drinks, cordial, alcohol or anything else do not count in your water intake, so don’t count it.

I will wet myself – As we get older or after having kids, we can lose strength in our pelvic floor region. Simple pelvic floor exercises can help to restore these muscles and minimize the frequency of needing to go to the toilet. Try to minimize your water intake after 6pm if you are worried about getting through the night. You can also try mixing your filtered water with a splash of freshly squeezed juice and a pinch of sea salt. The tiny particles of sugar from the juice and salt will help the molecules bond better with your cells and reduce your bathroom frequency.

I really can’t emphasis enough the importance of drinking clean water enough, to improve every aspect of your wellbeing, so ensure you make this a priority.

So I’m interested to know, how much water do you drink per day and what amount do you think is optimal for you?

Rob

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November 17, 2017 0 comment

RECENT POSTS LIVING TRUE

Live in the Present

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What is living in the present?

Many of us have heard about the need to live more in ‘the present,’ but what does this really mean?

There are different levels of being present, but it basically means to be conscious, aware and in the present with all of your senses. That is, your awareness is completely centred on the here and now. It means not dwelling on or thinking about the past, nor being anxious or worrying about the future.

Why is it so important to live in the present?

It is essential that we live in the present because this is the only moment that really exists – everything/life happens in the now. It is simply all we have. As such, both the past and the future only exist in your mind. The past is gone, meaning it can’t be changed. Whilst the future is not guaranteed, meaning we are never sure what direction our life will go. Therefore if you are not living in the present, then you are simply not living in reality and with that you are not living true.

But I suppose the real reason why it’s important to live in the present is because everything that you truly desire in life, including good health and happiness exists only in the present. That’s why it’s called the ‘present’ – it’s a gift. Obviously the opposite is also true – the more you live in the past and future the more you experience fear bases emotions such as depression and anxiety.

How do we live in the present?

Despite the fundamental importance of living in the present, there seems to be much confusion of how best to do so. But essentially, there are really 2 main ways to live in the present…

1.The first and easier way is to ‘try to live more in the present:’

The idea here being to become more fully absorbed in the present moment by shifting out attention away from both the past and future and instead focusing on whatever it is we are doing.

In a negative way this includes many of the addiction type behaviours such as smoking, drinking, drugs, gambling, etc. In one sense this is not so much living in the present so much as it is distracting yourself away from your past and future.

However in a more positive way, this may include things such as a doing a favourite hobby like going fishing or sewing, or doing things like exercising, socialising with friends, time with your pets, doing work we enjoy, or even going on holidays. Basically it can include anything we are doing in which we are not multitasking.

With that said however, as beneficial as these positive activities are, they only allow us to temporarily access the present moment when we are doing them. This is because when we stop doing them, our mind naturally begins to gravitate back to the past or future tense. This happens because the ego part of your mind is always subconsciously trying to identify with something from your past or future, in order to reinforce your identity – which is what you call ‘I.’ And this takes me onto the next point…

2.The second and harder way is to ‘become one with the present’:

I say the harder way because unlike the first way, this way requires self-development work which many of us can find difficult. There are many different types of self-development work which you can do to help you live more in the present, including things such as practicing self-compassion/acceptance/ forgiveness/gratitude, seeing a psychologist including things like CBT and ACT therapies, doing yoga, meditation including mindfulness, counselling, general healing and balancing modalities, spirituality, and so forth. These are all things I encourage, some necessary and some not so depending upon your level of awareness.

However with that said, being one with the present is essentially achieved through remembering who you really are (also known as self-actualisation), which is really the ultimate goal behind all of these different modalities and of all self-development work. The benefit of accessing the present this way is that once you do, you unintentionally become present in each and every moment of life without having to deliberately try to do so. Unfortunately, as life has become increasingly busy, more and more of us have lost focus of who we really are and with it our oneness with the present. Sure we like to think we know who we are, but the vast majority of us do not. I’ll ask you now, do you know who you really are?

But putting all other modalities aside, there is a simple deprogramming activity you can do write now to find out who you are, so that you can begin live more fully in the present.

The best way to become clear on who you are is to first become clear on who you are not. So let me give you a few tips of who you aren’t.

You are not…

Your occupation and/or title (I’m a doctor, a CEO, machine operator, teacher)

Your emotional states (I’m happy, sad, depressed, peaceful)

Your behaviours (I’m a yo-yo dieter, an alcoholic, a gambler)

Your roles (I’m a mother, sister, friend, eldest brother)

Your body (I’m beautiful, skinny, fat, short, ugly, sexy)

Your age (old, young, 30, 60)

Your material possessions and/or income (I drive a sports car, I have three houses, I’m a millionaire, I’m working class, I’m poor)

Your reputation (I’m useless, I’m special, I’m popular)

Your religious or spiritual beliefs (I’m Catholic, Buddhist, Muslim, Atheist)

Essentially you are not anything which constitutes your ‘story’ so to speak.

So let me ask you this – If nothing from your past defies who you are today then who are you?

Sure this may sound crazy, because if you are none of these things then who are you … right? I mean there’s not much left for you to identify with especially if you can’t identity with any of these things. And that’s my point — all you have left to identify with is the present moment. And so, the answer to who you are is ‘presence’ itself or ‘consciousness’ – that’s it.

On a deeper level, living in the present really means to live from a place of wholeness — without any identification with past or future tense. The more conscious you become of who you really are, the less you require anything from your past or future to form or enhance your identity. And when you have nothing left to identify with but your own conscious presence, you automatically begin to live more in the present moment.

Obviously with that said the opposite is also true – by making a conscious choice to live only in the present moment, you disallow anything from your past or future to influence your true nature. In fact, you are never more fully who you are than when you live in the present moment.

So remember, if you don’t live in the present, then you are not only fooling yourself, but also those around you. You will never achieve peak health and happiness, because you are living in a fictitious reality that you have created for yourself, and one which stress is a part of everyday life. One which affects everything you think, say and do in every single area of your life, including your health, relationships, work, faith and everything between.

Instead, aim to become increasingly conscious of your true nature, and as you do you will begin to live more fully in the present. This is a key attribute of living true and essentially of living a happier, healthier, fitter life.

So, I’d like to hear your thoughts on all of this?

Do you find that you spend most of your time in the past and future or do you find that you live mostly in the present and why?

Rob

November 2, 2017 0 comment